the friend with benefits

The sex buddy.

What a scintillating concept. Anytime you feel your loins twitch and naughty flashes of primal pleasure flirt through your mind, a phone call is all it takes to quench that carnal thirst.

But as two friends of mine recently found out, this concept isn’t for anyone vaguely in touch with their emotions.

Their trysts quickly crossed the line into potential boyfriend-land and began to get ugly.

I asked them if they believed they had remained within the unsaid boundaries of buddy relations.

“Yes.” They were very, very quick to point out. “But he said this, then he said that, then he did that so what was that supposed to mean??!”

Amused as I was, it got me thinking about how many people really think about these “boundaries” before they begin treading water in the pond of lust.

So I thought I may take a stab and see what you might have to consider if you ever felt the need to wander into the wonders that is the sex buddy.

Here are a few I came up with:

• Emotions are to be kept at bay, any of your baggage are for your mates, girlfriends and therapist

• Wining and dining are for relationships. The attraction of this arrangement is that the need for romance is replaced by a clear understanding of both participants’ intentions. It is sex. Nothing more, nothing less.

• Details of your relationship history, bad days at work, euphoria at landing that promotion are again for your mates, girlfriends and therapist. These may be used as cause for a celebratory afternoon session but keep it simple and keep the particulars out of it.

• Both parties are free to see other people. Jealousy needs a good kick up the backside or at the very least, stored under your bed and vented out to someone who is obligated to care.

• Apart from a great shag, there should be no other expectations. No. None.

• Tantrums. Just not on.

• Honesty is key with your buddy and especially with yourself- if you want more, and they don’t, pack your bags and walk.

• If you at any point on more than one occasion have to sit there and wonder... “What did he/she mean by that?!” Pack your bags and walk.

• Respect yourself, stay true to how you feel, remember and know your self-worth.

• Bail if you start to feel cheap. Bail if the both of you aren’t equal partners in this deal.

Whew.

NATURALLY HEAL INSECT BITES

Okay, so the days for camping, hiking and hunting are right around the corner. Those long hot days and nights spent outdoors can sometimes lead to insect bites. If you find yourself a tasty treat for some insect you can treat those bites with this:

Chew (without sucking the nutrients out of it) some fresh oregano, rosemary or basil and spread it on the bite. This will help with the itchiness and take away some of the swelling.

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

magical mustard seed

There is an old Chinese tale about a woman whose only son died. In her grief, she went to the holy man and asked, "What prayers, what magical incantations do you have to bring my son back to life?"

Instead of sending her away or reasoning with her, he said to her, "Fetch me a mustard seed from a home that has never known sorrow. We will use it to drive the sorrow out of your life." The woman went off at once in search of that magical mustard seed.

She came first to a splendid mansion, knocked at the door, and said, "I am looking for a home that has never known sorrow. Is this such a place? It is very important to me."

They told her, "You've certainly come to the wrong place," and began to describe all the tragic things that recently had befallen them.

The woman said to herself, "Who is better able to help these poor, unfortunate people than I, who have had misfortune of my my own?"

She stayed to comfort them, then went on in search of a home that had never known sorrow. But wherever she turned, in hotels and in other places, she found one tale after another of sadness and misfortune.

The woman became so involved in helping others cope with their sorrows that she eventually let go of her own. She would later come to understand that it was the quest to find the magical mustard seed that drove away her suffering.

NATURAL SEDATIVES FOR INSOMNIACS

We all get insomnia, some more often than others. This common problem is something that millions of people seek drug treatment for that ends up in chemical dependency. Taking just a few herbs can help the body and mind relax. These herbs have no side effects and are effective- so effective and safe that they have been widely used throughout thousands of years. Here are some of the herbs I have planted in my herb garden to use as sedatives for my family:

1. Chamomile
2. Coriander
3. St. John’s Wort
4. Valerian Root

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

the true meaning of peace

There once was a king who offered a prize to the artist
who would paint the best picture of peace. Many artists
tried. The king looked at all the pictures. But there
were only two he really liked, and he had to choose
between them.

One picture was of a calm lake. The lake was a
perfect mirror for peaceful towering mountains all around
it. Overhead was a blue sky with fluffy white clouds.
All who saw this picture thought that it was a perfect
picture of peace.

The other picture had mountains, too. But these were rugged
and bare. Above was an angry sky, from which rain fell and in which lightning played. Down the side of the mountain tumbled a foaming waterfall. This did not look peaceful at all.

But when the king looked closely, he saw behind the waterfall a tiny bush growing in a crack in the rock. In the bush a mother bird had built her nest. There, in the midst of the rush of angry water, sat the mother bird on her nest - in perfect peace.

Which picture do you think won the prize? The king chose the second picture. Do you know why?

"Because," explained the king, "peace does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble, or hard work. Peace means to be in the midst of all those things and still be calm in your heart. That is the real meaning of peace."

USES FOR LEMON BALM

Lemon Balm is a member of the mint family. It has a pleasant aroma and taste of a lemony mint sort. This is a wonderful anti-viral herb!!! Taking it when the body has a virus of any sort can clean the body of the problem and limit the time sick. Along with this superb quality, it is also a tranquilizer and can heal the body in a number of ways including:
• stops the division and growth of tumors
• significantly reduces symptoms of Grave’s disease
• cures eczema
• gets rid of headaches and migraines
• diminishes or eliminates symptoms of gout
• alleviates colic
• controls symptoms of ADHD
• potent anti-histamine elements

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

the best time of my life

It was August 24, and in two days I would be turning thirty. I was insecure about entering a new decade of my life and feared that my best years were now behind me.

My daily routine included going to the gym for a workout before going to work. Every morning I would see my friend Nicholas at the gym. He was seventy-nine years old and in terrific shape. As I greeted Nicholas on this particular day, he noticed I wasn't full of my usual vitality and asked if there was anything wrong. I told him I was feeling anxious about turning thirty. I wondered how I would look back on my life once I reached Nicholas's age, so I asked him, "What was the best time of your life?"

Without hesitation, Nicholas replied, "Well, Joe, this is my philosophical answer to your philosophical question:

"When I was a child in Austria and everything was taken care of for me and I was nurtured by my parents, that was the best time of my life.

"When I was going to school and learning the things I know today, that was the best time of my life.

"When I got my first job and had responsibilities and got paid for my efforts, that was the best time of my life.

"When I met my wife and fell in love, that was the best time of my life.

"The Second World War came, and my wife and I had to flee Austria to save our lives. When we were together and safe on a ship bound for North America, that was the best time of my life.

"When we came to Canada and started a family, that was the best time of my life.

"When I was a young father, watching my children grow up, that was the best time of my life.

"And now, Joe, I am seventy-nine years old. I have my health, I feel good and I am in love with my wife just as I was when we first met. This is the best time of my life."

USES FOR CHICORY

Chicory is considered by many to be a weed. But little do these people realize that it is also a very nutritious plant. It is versatile and all parts can be eaten. It grows pretty much anywhere and can often be found in vacant land lots, fields, and even alongside the road. The roots can be boiled and serve as a vegetable, the leaves can be washed and become a nutritious salad and if one wished to have a drink such as coffee they can toast the root and crush it to deliver a warm substitute.

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

the mexican fisherman

The American investment banker was at the pier of a
small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with
just one fisherman docked.

Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna.
The American complimented the Mexican on the quality
of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The Mexican replied, "Only a little while."

The American then asked, "Why didn't you stay out longer
and catch more fish?"

The Mexican said, "With this I have more than enough to support my family's needs."

The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life."

The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing; and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat: With the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats. Eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the
processor; eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then Los Angeles and eventually New York where you will run your ever-expanding enterprise."

The Mexican fisherman asked, "But, how long will this all take?"

To which the American replied, "15 to 20 years."

"But what then?" asked the Mexican.

The American laughed and said that's the best part. "When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions."

"Millions?...Then what?"

The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos."

WHAT IS A TINCTURE?

A tincture is used for a variety of health conditions and it is often used in homeopathic or herbal medicine. Prior to the last decade or so tinctures were utilized widely as a form of medicine. A tincture is consumed to heal medical condition or health problems. The steps below are how you can make a tincture at home to help treat your minor health issues.

1. A strong alcohol such as vodka, rum or gin can be used.
2. Stick the needed herbs in a jar.
3. Fill a jar half way with the alcohol (over the herbs).
4. Let the tincture sit for 1-2 weeks and drink a small portion (portions should be researched!) each day for symptoms.

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

plane rides from the nethers

I love flying. Everything about planes excites me, probably because it usually means I’m on vacation. The only thing about planes that irk me are the other passengers. I don’t dislike them all, just the ones that get seated next to me who are decidedly quite disgusting.

If there was one thing that would motivate me to make more money in life, it would be that I could buy a ticket on first class and have my private own cubicle.

So I thought that I’d list some of the grubs I’ve been lucky enough to sit next to and see if anyone else can top / add to the list…

Sitting securely at the number one spot:

An elderly man was sitting next to me one flight. The food arrived. He asks the flight attendant for an extra glass of water. He moves the first glass onto MY table, and places the second one on his tray. He proceeds to then noisily remove his DENCHERS and places these into the second cup, providing me with an appetising view of his choppers while I enjoy my meal.

Coming up in second place…

Upon falling asleep, man breaks into a steady, almost rhythmic display of flatulence. At first, I exploded into giggles…but that came to an abrupt halt the moment they ceased to be odorless.

In third position…

Woman who spends entire trip coughing and sneezing without observing the need to cover her mouth/nose for the benefit of the entire plane, and especially for me. The cherry on this cake of germs was when she wiped and picked her nose, then wiped it on her seat.

Fourth position goes to…

Man who feels it is quite acceptable to sit with legs spread wide enough to take up half of my own cramped leg room. Really, if he insists that it’s his right to sit spread eagled in ECONOMY class and take up half of my own space, he should pay for half of my ticket. I don't believe that's an unreasonable ask.

USES OF ALDER

Alder is a tree that closely resembles a birch tree. Typically the inner bark is used to treat ailments. A person can either use the bark to apply topically to cuts, scrapes or even burns by chewing yet careful not to suck any of the nutrients or “medicinal qualities” from it. It can be directly applied to the wounded area.

Also, the inner bark of the Alder tree can be boiled and the tea that is made from it can be drunk. This will relieve stomach or abdominal problems such as nausea, cramping, diarrhea etc.

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

the superficial

A former Ralph Lauren model has claimed that her contract with the company was not renewed because she was too fat.

Surprised anyone?

Karl Lagerfeld is renowned for only using the thinnest of thin models on his catwalk, and even came out recently to basically state that “realistic” women have no place on the runway. At one point, he himself also teetered dangerously close to looking seriously underweight and emaciated.

This industry has been around for decades and it’s not that often you see anyone who is anyone, step up the ladder of social responsibility.

The fashion world is what it is. Those that reside in this world live on a diet of predominately air and cabbage. They are under the strong illusion that they live and are the true definition of “beauty” and most of the time are high kites on various “happy” medicines. Many of the designers prefer walking clothes hangers to women whose hip bones don’t make the finish line before the rest of their bodies do.

Yes, yes I know, the above are tiresome clichés. I don’t doubt there are exceptions to these. It would be marvelous to see the media get as excited over stories where models and designers stray from the norm as when the likes of Lagerfeld come out making ridiculous statements. But the latter makes more sensational headlines unfortunately.

All we can do is work on ways to boost our self-confidence and self-worth while living side by side with the fashion world. Because that is the ultimate test isn’t it- to be able to love yourself wholly while being surrounded by a world where the superficial reign.

I’d like to believe that there are models out there who love to eat and that actually do while still maintaining a healthy career in what is a stressful industry.

Until then, work your damndest not to let it take away from the beauty every single one of us are born with. It’s hard, but you can do it slowly and surely.

REMEDY FOR GALLSTONES

Gallstones are common so having a natural remedy for them is necessary. I have comprised a list of safe and effective homeopathic medicines that can eliminate symptoms while ridding the body of the stones. Remember to follow homeopathic dosage and never take the potent form of the elements.

Berbis Vulgaris: sharp stabbing pains that range through the groin, pelvic and back area.
Calcarea Carbonica: swollen abdomen, chest pain, exhaustion, clammy hands, chills.
Chelidonium Majus: pain is generally confined to the back, shoulders and chest.
Colocynthis: painful cramping
Nux Vomica: pain seems to travel in an upward motion, swollen abdomen, nausea, chills, cramping, with severe irritability.
Podophyllum: constipation or hard stools.

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

teaching chris brown

I'm not too sure if I need to say too much about this.

Chris Brown has been convicted of assaulting his then girlfriend Rhianna. Assaulting her- aka bashing her almost to the point of no recognition, biting her, degrading her, slamming her head against the car window.

A month or so ago, he posts a little video up on the internet thanking his loyal fans and calling everyone else who aren't supporting him- "haters".

Doesn't sound too remorseful to me...but who am I to judge?

After pleading guilty, the courts give him 180 days of community service and placed him on probation for the next 5 years.

So if I think about this for a bit....he will still be able to make music, travel the world (unless this conviction hinders that slightly?), and still make BUCKETLOADS of money.

Wow. That's teaching him responsibility for his actions. That teaches him to respect people. That shows him and the world how seriously the court system regards violence against women and violence in general.

But hey, I could be wrong.

NATURAL BIPOLAR REMEDIES

What is Bipolar?
The term bipolar refers to an extreme shift or change in a person’s mood and perception that sways from one side of the polar spectrum to the other. The polar spectrum is a scale of sorts, happy on one side and angry on the other. Now a whole lot of emotions are inside this scale from sad to fearful to irritated, etc.

How can a Person Treat Bipolar Naturally?

• St. John’s Wort
• Ginseng
• Gingko Biloba
• Gotu Kola
• Damiana
• SAM-e

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

nails in the fence

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there."

The little boy then understood how powerful his words were. He looked up at his father and said "I hope you can forgive me father for the holes I put in you."

"Of course I can," said the father.

REMEDY FOR SORE THROATS

Sore throats are very common. This is something that I do not want to take medications for or rely on something that could possibly deliver side effects. Herbs are perfect for this problem. In my herb garden I planted the following for sore throats:

1. Calendula (for a gargle rinse)
2. Horehound (chop leaves to make a tea w/ honey)
3. Hyssop (tea)
4. Summer Savory (a gargle rinse)
5. Thyme (tea)

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

thanks for your time

It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday."

Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

"Jack, did you hear me?"

"Oh sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.

"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

"I loved that old house he lived in," Jack said.

"You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said.

"He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said. "I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important... Mom, I'll be there for the funeral," Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time.

Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time.

The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture... Jack stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked.

"The box is gone," he said.

"What box?" Mom asked.

"There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was 'the thing I value most,'" Jack said.

It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

"Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said. "I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died. Returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox. "Signature required on a package. No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention.

"Mr. Harold Belser" it read.

Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside.

"Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life." A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch.

Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these words engraved:

"Jack, Thanks for your time! -Harold Belser."

"The thing he valued most...was...my time."

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. "Why?" Janet, his assistant asked.

"I need some time to spend with my son," he said. "Oh, by the way, Janet... thanks for your time!"

VITAMINS B6

Vitamin B6 is an essential nutrient. If we have a B6 deficiency it can bring with it terrible consequences. For instance:
• Anxiety
• Stress
• Depression

It is a proven fact that women can easily become deficient as they get older. What food are the best to consume this vitamin naturally?
• Potatoes
• Bananas
• Red meat
• Poultry

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

everybody and everyone

There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody would not do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done.

HERBS FOR CATARACTS

Chinese herbs are great for eye problems. Cataracts are very common in aging individuals. So, which Chinese herbs can heal issues with this specific vision problem?

• Yi qi cong ming tang combines ginseng, pueraria and astragalus.
• Ci zhu wan focuses more on the mind and vision aspects.
• Ming mu di huang wan is a medicine that combines rehmannia and bright eyes together to improve vision disorders by enhancing kidney and liver function.

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

pursuit of happiness

Can we be happy for no reason at all?

“To be happy for no reason is the happiness we want to experience” – “Power, Freedom and Grace”- Deepak Chopra

This is apparently the Holy Grail to true happiness. And it does makes sense. If you are happy just because…happy just being.

All that you have accrued in your life, and all that you are planning to, aren’t the cause of your happiness- they are simply just there, part of life’s grand plan. And again, you are just happy, for simply no reason.

your life. People pass on, move on, jobs are lost and gained, relationships sometimes don’t make it and when they do, take you on a wonderful rollercoaster of ups and downs. So, to be nondependent on any of these for your innate and core happiness, must be truly freeing.

When I think about it, the sheer freedom this would provide is quite staggering.

While I know that life is full of ups and downs that will test you, to be able to distance yourself from them enough to ride the wave of highs and lows, without it taking away from your innate and core happiness, is a concept I can’t get my head around.

Not that I don’t believe it is possible to achieve, just that I wonder if I will ever be able to achieve it. Deepak Chopra and others like him make it sound easy enough.

On good days, I can see it, and sometimes even feel it. I sit in the park for hours simply watching the trees dance, thinking about nothing at all. I’m happier on these days and it’s a happiness that lasts longer.

However, on rubbish days, it’s a little harder. When life throws its curve balls in my direction and my attempts to dodge them fail, I can’t help but feel far from what all that these spiritual books try to teach.

It’s easy enough to surround yourself with nature and feel the inner peace seep through, but quite another to be surrounded by our world where egos are rife and still keep yourself distanced- and that’s the real challenge isn’t it!

But just how do you create this bubble around yourself that distances you enough from situations and people you love, to be able to take hits and misses with the same laughing breath as you would a day of absolute joy?

I’ve recently taken up meditation and so far it has been the best thing I could have done. Perhaps, through silencing the mind, I can finally live in a world of manic egos and keep my own ego at bay, and see life as it’s truly meant to be seen.

Being happy for no reason at all…I'm on my way!

REMEDIES FOR YOUR PETS

We want the best for our pets. It is important that we do not rush to the vet for a new product or treatment each time our pet get sick or injured. Studies show that animals respond much better to natural approaches to medicine. This is likely due to the fact that animals have not been corrupted by chemicals. They still live naturally. Animals have long (since the dawn of time) instinctively cured themselves by natural elements. This is how Native Americans knew which plants could heal.

Today these animals do not roam around free and do not have access to these elements. But we do. The internet is a wonderful thing. Look up the symptoms of your pet and begin them on a natural healing regiment.

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.