the friend with benefits

The sex buddy.

What a scintillating concept. Anytime you feel your loins twitch and naughty flashes of primal pleasure flirt through your mind, a phone call is all it takes to quench that carnal thirst.

But as two friends of mine recently found out, this concept isn’t for anyone vaguely in touch with their emotions.

Their trysts quickly crossed the line into potential boyfriend-land and began to get ugly.

I asked them if they believed they had remained within the unsaid boundaries of buddy relations.

“Yes.” They were very, very quick to point out. “But he said this, then he said that, then he did that so what was that supposed to mean??!”

Amused as I was, it got me thinking about how many people really think about these “boundaries” before they begin treading water in the pond of lust.

So I thought I may take a stab and see what you might have to consider if you ever felt the need to wander into the wonders that is the sex buddy.

Here are a few I came up with:

• Emotions are to be kept at bay, any of your baggage are for your mates, girlfriends and therapist

• Wining and dining are for relationships. The attraction of this arrangement is that the need for romance is replaced by a clear understanding of both participants’ intentions. It is sex. Nothing more, nothing less.

• Details of your relationship history, bad days at work, euphoria at landing that promotion are again for your mates, girlfriends and therapist. These may be used as cause for a celebratory afternoon session but keep it simple and keep the particulars out of it.

• Both parties are free to see other people. Jealousy needs a good kick up the backside or at the very least, stored under your bed and vented out to someone who is obligated to care.

• Apart from a great shag, there should be no other expectations. No. None.

• Tantrums. Just not on.

• Honesty is key with your buddy and especially with yourself- if you want more, and they don’t, pack your bags and walk.

• If you at any point on more than one occasion have to sit there and wonder... “What did he/she mean by that?!” Pack your bags and walk.

• Respect yourself, stay true to how you feel, remember and know your self-worth.

• Bail if you start to feel cheap. Bail if the both of you aren’t equal partners in this deal.

Whew.

NATURALLY HEAL INSECT BITES

Okay, so the days for camping, hiking and hunting are right around the corner. Those long hot days and nights spent outdoors can sometimes lead to insect bites. If you find yourself a tasty treat for some insect you can treat those bites with this:

Chew (without sucking the nutrients out of it) some fresh oregano, rosemary or basil and spread it on the bite. This will help with the itchiness and take away some of the swelling.

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

magical mustard seed

There is an old Chinese tale about a woman whose only son died. In her grief, she went to the holy man and asked, "What prayers, what magical incantations do you have to bring my son back to life?"

Instead of sending her away or reasoning with her, he said to her, "Fetch me a mustard seed from a home that has never known sorrow. We will use it to drive the sorrow out of your life." The woman went off at once in search of that magical mustard seed.

She came first to a splendid mansion, knocked at the door, and said, "I am looking for a home that has never known sorrow. Is this such a place? It is very important to me."

They told her, "You've certainly come to the wrong place," and began to describe all the tragic things that recently had befallen them.

The woman said to herself, "Who is better able to help these poor, unfortunate people than I, who have had misfortune of my my own?"

She stayed to comfort them, then went on in search of a home that had never known sorrow. But wherever she turned, in hotels and in other places, she found one tale after another of sadness and misfortune.

The woman became so involved in helping others cope with their sorrows that she eventually let go of her own. She would later come to understand that it was the quest to find the magical mustard seed that drove away her suffering.

NATURAL SEDATIVES FOR INSOMNIACS

We all get insomnia, some more often than others. This common problem is something that millions of people seek drug treatment for that ends up in chemical dependency. Taking just a few herbs can help the body and mind relax. These herbs have no side effects and are effective- so effective and safe that they have been widely used throughout thousands of years. Here are some of the herbs I have planted in my herb garden to use as sedatives for my family:

1. Chamomile
2. Coriander
3. St. John’s Wort
4. Valerian Root

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

the true meaning of peace

There once was a king who offered a prize to the artist
who would paint the best picture of peace. Many artists
tried. The king looked at all the pictures. But there
were only two he really liked, and he had to choose
between them.

One picture was of a calm lake. The lake was a
perfect mirror for peaceful towering mountains all around
it. Overhead was a blue sky with fluffy white clouds.
All who saw this picture thought that it was a perfect
picture of peace.

The other picture had mountains, too. But these were rugged
and bare. Above was an angry sky, from which rain fell and in which lightning played. Down the side of the mountain tumbled a foaming waterfall. This did not look peaceful at all.

But when the king looked closely, he saw behind the waterfall a tiny bush growing in a crack in the rock. In the bush a mother bird had built her nest. There, in the midst of the rush of angry water, sat the mother bird on her nest - in perfect peace.

Which picture do you think won the prize? The king chose the second picture. Do you know why?

"Because," explained the king, "peace does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble, or hard work. Peace means to be in the midst of all those things and still be calm in your heart. That is the real meaning of peace."

USES FOR LEMON BALM

Lemon Balm is a member of the mint family. It has a pleasant aroma and taste of a lemony mint sort. This is a wonderful anti-viral herb!!! Taking it when the body has a virus of any sort can clean the body of the problem and limit the time sick. Along with this superb quality, it is also a tranquilizer and can heal the body in a number of ways including:
• stops the division and growth of tumors
• significantly reduces symptoms of Grave’s disease
• cures eczema
• gets rid of headaches and migraines
• diminishes or eliminates symptoms of gout
• alleviates colic
• controls symptoms of ADHD
• potent anti-histamine elements

These are just my opinions. You should do your own research when trying anything on this site.

the best time of my life

It was August 24, and in two days I would be turning thirty. I was insecure about entering a new decade of my life and feared that my best years were now behind me.

My daily routine included going to the gym for a workout before going to work. Every morning I would see my friend Nicholas at the gym. He was seventy-nine years old and in terrific shape. As I greeted Nicholas on this particular day, he noticed I wasn't full of my usual vitality and asked if there was anything wrong. I told him I was feeling anxious about turning thirty. I wondered how I would look back on my life once I reached Nicholas's age, so I asked him, "What was the best time of your life?"

Without hesitation, Nicholas replied, "Well, Joe, this is my philosophical answer to your philosophical question:

"When I was a child in Austria and everything was taken care of for me and I was nurtured by my parents, that was the best time of my life.

"When I was going to school and learning the things I know today, that was the best time of my life.

"When I got my first job and had responsibilities and got paid for my efforts, that was the best time of my life.

"When I met my wife and fell in love, that was the best time of my life.

"The Second World War came, and my wife and I had to flee Austria to save our lives. When we were together and safe on a ship bound for North America, that was the best time of my life.

"When we came to Canada and started a family, that was the best time of my life.

"When I was a young father, watching my children grow up, that was the best time of my life.

"And now, Joe, I am seventy-nine years old. I have my health, I feel good and I am in love with my wife just as I was when we first met. This is the best time of my life."